The solid generation
My mother has recently passed away after ninety-two years of intense and meaningful life. When I reflect on how much I owe her, I think by extension of an entire generation that shares with her some distinctive traits that define them as the solid generation. Solidity of a mountain crag defying the storms.
This generation had to deal with a fratricidal war, with a horrible postwar period, and with several decades of extreme poverty. They were the ones who worked when they were young, founded families and supported them with their work, educated their children, who had an easier life than the previous generation; they took care of their parents, helped care for and guard their grandchildren, and during the crisis supported many families with their modest pension. They accepted reality as it was, without escapism or idealization. Knowing that, even if existence was harsh, it was not helpful to imagine it differently, nor to take refuge in fanciful dreams.
They had solidly learned principles in the school of life, which for them were non-negotiable, because they were inscribed in common sense. To a large extent, they were based on a faith as simple as it was profound, which led them to give what they had: time, goods and energy to whoever requested it. They had their truths, which guided them along the path of life, but they did not pretend to give lessons. nobody, because they knew their limits well, and they understood that there were people who knew much more than they did, and that the truth is not identified with what one fancy, but is the result of arduous search and commitment.
This generation did not waste energy in complaints and regrets. He assumed his responsibilities and knew how to ask for forgiveness, without blaming anyone for his own mistakes. He decisively faced the discomforts and the struggles, because they knew well that life is hard, and that they could not waste energy in regretting. They did not expect anyone to solve their problems, although they were willing to help anyone who asked.
Grateful generation, which, since it knew well the hardness of life, also knew the art of valuing the little things, pondering them and being grateful for them. They did not interpret favors as something that was due to them, but they knew what they cost and appreciated them in due measure.
My mother taught me the meaning of the word love more than any book on spirituality. She knew how to take care of my father when Alzheimer’s disease deprived him of her mental faculties, taking care of him with heroism, generosity and dedication. She was aware of her needs twenty-four hours a day, without regrets and without giving importance. She did not complain that her husband’s dependence on her deprived him of the freedom to which she was entitled. She forgot about herself, and only thought of making life as easy as possible for him, putting all her energy into it. She was well aware that she had made a promise to love each other for life, and that now was the time to put it into practice.
I remember the response my parents gave me and my brother, when independently and at the same time, we both announced that we wanted to be Salesians. “Don’t worry, follow your vocation. God will not abandon us.” The faith anchored in the depths of the person cannot be expressed better and more simply. No fuss or boasts. I have never forgotten these words and this attitude. And they have been, without a doubt, one of the greatest life lessons that I have received in my existence.
I think by contrast of the liquid world that surrounds us; focused on a toxic individualism, which cultivates self-reference as a permanent category of life; and it produces so many victims, and causes so many mental disorders that they fill psychiatrists’ offices.
My parents and their generation decided to be happy, knowing their place in the whirlwind of life, in which they found the traces that God discreetly leaves behind. They knew how to give meaning to his life, and fill it with good things, because that is how fleeting existence is filled with eternity.
We can never thank you enough for how much you have left us.
Miguel Gambin