Sometimes we keep grudges, failures and frustrations in our souls that mistreat our mood and undermine our self-esteem, to the point that they ruin our daily lives.
The worst thing is that out of pride, fear or cowardice we condemn ourselves to live with those memories stuck in our hearts.
And it’s not just about the uncomfortable pain we feel living like this, but about insisting on ‘poking’ the soul with resentments and negative attitudes that damage the spirit.
How many of us feel pain that breaks our spirits?
There are all kinds of pain: emotional, sentimental, work, family and even the ‘absurd’, or rather, those we invented.
The latter are very common in jealous, insecure or anxious women and men.
What is described here ranges from love disappointments; going through disagreements with ‘dad’ or ‘mom’, for some nonsense; until reaching the feeling of guilt that assails us when we do wrong.
Many of us, without even realizing it, allow others to hurt us, emotionally speaking. And instead of preventing them from hurting us more, all we do is insist on constantly remembering what they do to us.
It is not about ‘getting the thorn out of us’, as is popularly said; but of wanting to heal ourselves naturally.
That is, you have to remove the annoyance, but without hatred. Rather, we cannot take revenge. If we do it with anger, when trying to remove the thorn, we sink it deeper and the only thing we achieve is to see the most embedded splinter in the heart.
The truth is that our life, like a rose, has thorns and that doesn’t stop it from being beautiful. The thorns exist and we have to find the best formula to remove them, without hurting ourselves more, much less offending others.
They are small and as they are not hard enough they can be difficult to remove, because they will break as soon as we touch them with the ‘revenge pliers’.
Some say that if the thorns do not cause pain, they will fall of their own accord when she sheds sadness. But if despite this they hurt, it is better to remove them with love and serenity.
The pains of the soul can become our Achilles heel, only if we allow it. They show us the weak side that we all have, so we feel perfect.
We need to improve our self-esteem, strengthen our relationship as a couple; and live in harmony with ourselves and with others.
It will also be essential to understand the difference between soul and spirit, and on that basis strengthen our relationship with our families, our friends and, above all, with God.
TELL US YOUR CASE!
Concerns frequently assault our state of mind. However, with each question we have one more chance to face a new horizon, either by reasoning or applying healthy strategies for the soul. What are those fears that affect you today? Tell us about them to reflect on it on this page. Send your testimony to Euclides Kilô Ardila at the following email: eardila@vanguardia.com In this column, he himself will respond. Let’s look at today’s case:
Testimony: “I go through a state of boredom that makes me very desperate and that, without knowing why, makes my surroundings bother me and makes me see the environment too unpleasant. Could it be that I lost motivation? What will be happening to me? Why do I live like this? I would like you to give me some advice.”
Answer: You, me and all of us, at certain times in our lives, have allowed ourselves to be invaded by boredom. That has happened to me on several occasions and, consequently, I tell you that I understand.
However, beyond the tedium that you may feel today, I perceive between your lines that what is happening to you is something more than a loss of motivation.
That of assuring that what surrounds you is “unpleasant” implies that you must take deep measures to get out of that ‘mood marasmus’ in which you are.
I could suggest that you change your routines and habits, among other things, because any variation would be a great stimulus. Maybe he could exercise and he should even try to be happy, beyond the afugias.
And if the issue is so desperate, it might be appropriate to go to psychological therapy to treat possible traumas or realities in your life that you should address.
However, the decision to get out of this quagmire must start from yourself and from your reality. Don’t let the routine catch you, work for your dreams, undertake, love, have fun… what do I know.
Ultimately, you must do what makes you turn on that inner light that lies deep in your heart. Ask God for calm and serenity!
BRIEF REFLECTIONS
* And when you least expect it, a melody tells you everything you needed to hear. That is why, as the lyrics of an old song say: “We must give thanks for music”. She can even help us to be resilient by reinterpreting difficult experiences to make them less traumatic.
* Blaming others first becomes an ugly habit and then becomes a dangerous strategy that makes you look like another victim and turns you into a coward. Be careful: never blame others for your situation, among other things, because you are what you are because of the decisions you have made.
* No one walks in this life without having stepped on the wrong foot; no one is brave without having in the bottom of his heart a drop of fear; no one can be free if they have not first untied their own chains; no one picks roses without feeling their thorns; and, above all, no one achieves success without the help of God.