Assisi 2022. Discovered the path of “forgiveness” in foster care





In the fifteenth year of the foundation of La Pietra Scartata, the adopted children announce that abandonment was not the last word in the ‘cross of our life’, but the beginning of a divine plan of salvation within which ‘we We ourselves can become the real protagonists’

In recent days, from 8 to 11 December, the national meeting on spirituality for the families of the association was held in Assisi The Rejected Stone and of the movement Ai.Bi. – Friends of the Children.

Dedicate yourself to deepening the invitation “Son, today he goes to work in the vineyard”, the meeting intended to reconsider and reiterate the beauty of hospitality and relaunch the mission of welcoming, adoptive and foster families.

A particularly heartfelt occasion as families were also able to celebrate the XV year of foundation de The Rejected Stonean association made up of families who, during their experience of hospitality, have felt called to bear witness to the Father’s love for abandoned children or children in family difficulty, announcing to them the hope of the abandoned and Risen Jesus.

At the end of the two intense days of meetings, prayers and reflections dedicated to the beauty of the hospitality experience and its happy and joyful announcement, the president Marco Griffini sketched an initial recap of some of the perspectives of commitment proposed, of the hardships experienced and of the risks encountered, attentions and sensitivities emerged and shared among the participants. Below we gladly resume and briefly illustrate some of the most significant passages.

Abandonment as treason

During the work, a new key category emerged to describe that experience which is usually called “abandonment”: if “abandonment” is a term usually used, even by adoptive parents, i.e. those who have not suffered abandonment, the adopted children also use the term “betrayal” to speak of their abandonment immediately.

A temptation, to settle

The two organizations are aware of experiencing a temptation, discovering themselves exposed to a risk, which emerges after decades of presence, activity and testimony: that of being satisfied with what has been built and created. It is essential to escape the trap of serene nostalgia to regenerate the desire for the future, seeing its steps in the footsteps of those who are willing to take up the new challenges to bear witness again to the possibility for abandoned children to be able to be children again.

Joy

Joy and gladness have emerged as recurring lived experiences and conditions in which we find ourselves when adoptive and foster families re-read the meaning of their own conjugal and family affairs.

Sharing and collaboration between associations

Increasingly important and enriching is the style of sharing and collaboration between organizations and bodies that pursue the same goals, safeguard and promote the same objectives, tackling challenges and problems that are sometimes similar if not identical.

Promote and welcome new memberships

In the fifteenth year of its foundation, La Pietra Scartata will undertake initiatives aimed at raising awareness and promoting new members, illustrating the profile, identity and meaning of the association that brings together people eager to be able to proclaim the hope and salvation of Jesus Christ to abandoned children , bearing witness to the possible surmountability of the condition of abandonment, through the experience of meeting the Risen One and welcoming him into one’s life. To join La Pietra Scartata it is necessary to undertake a path that begins with a meeting with one or more members who, by collecting the application for membership, start a preliminary journey by supporting the aspiring new members for a period of time that allows them to verify and confirm the desire to walk together with the other families in witnessing and associative service. At the end of the introduction and preparation process, the experience of the aspiring members is presented and illustrated by the tutor members to the board of directors for the admission decision.

Forgiveness

Thanks to the significant presence of the founder of the University of forgiveness of Turin, Father Gianfranco Testa, those present gathered some new aspects of the fundamental experience of forgiveness which are well compatible with the dynamics of abandonment and shattered family relationships. It was important to recover the authentic profile of forgiveness and the dynamics it manages to unleash. There are those who see forgiveness as a moral duty – «you must forgive» – but, to those who have been injured, can one ask to add to the pain suffered also the weight of looking at one’s offender with respect? Maybe this is not the forgiveness useful for rebuilding the person. At the same time, however, if we respond to evil with evil, we stretch a chain that keeps us enslaved. Forgiveness is breaking that chain. Forgiveness is liberation, is to build one’s life with all possible freedom. If it is true that forgiveness does not change the past, it can however liberate the future. If we have the right to feel anger in the face of an unjust fact, we must recognize that turning anger into resentment, living with anger, turns out to be just another misfortune. If, on the other hand, we manage to free our lives from the desire for revenge, if we don’t keep the evil within us towards those who have hurt us, then we heal the wound that has been inflicted on us and we feel capable of facing the future with freedom . Of course to forgive is not to forget, but it is remembering in a new and different way. It is also necessary in some way to “purify” our gaze on more difficult forgiveness: forgive yourself. No one is identifiable with what he has committed or suffered and rebuilding oneself is the greatest undertaking, but also the most necessary and liberating. Paradoxically, it is easier to offer our forgiveness to others than to ourselves. Whatever has happened in our life, we are not our mistake and we are not identifiable with what we have been through. Certainly the roots of the past can remain present, roots that we must be able to control and limit in their development. It’s true that forgiveness doesn’t change the past, forgiveness towards others and towards ourselves frees the future.

Therefore, itineraries and courses will be developed in collaboration with the University of Forgiveness of Turin, to introduce the dynamics of forgiveness, dedicated to both adopted children and parents.

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Assisi 2022. Discovered the path of “forgiveness” in foster care – La Pietra Scartata