Clayton* is 46 years old. His lover ? 64. And do you know what? The age difference does not bother him.
“Zero,” he nods, categorical, seated in a café in Little Italy. Because for him, “age does not count, but energy”, he qualifies. Narrative.
The charismatic forty-something, who works in the world of catering, wrote to us to mark the occasion of their ages with reversed figures. “It will only last a few months, but I find it very special. We often see inverted figures 23-32 years old, 34-43 years old, 35-53 years old, but rarely 46-64 years old and even less when it is the woman who is older. “And he wanted to testify, question of breaking some myths and other misconceptions. Because, as for him, “it’s stupid! “.
Let’s make things clear right away, therefore: no, his lover is not a “cougar”, even less a “predator”. They’re not just together for sex, even if it seems to be going very well on this side, thank you.
But let’s start with its beginnings. “I started early. A first blonde at 10! “, he confides with frankness, in a story full of anecdotes. At 14, he goes out with a girl of 16: “Because with her, I thought I had a chance…” A chance? “To lose my virginity!” »
The case, however, turns out to be “flatter” than expected (“the first time, I saw it as angels descending from the sky, like in 1980s mushy films!”). It’s finally a few years later, at CEGEP, that Clayton has fun for good. “I opened the machine, he illustrates, clapping his hands. let’s go. And it rolled. »
Rolled? He actually meets a few girls, gets blondes, and “it’s cool “, he summarizes. “I didn’t stay with the girl if it didn’t work out. If there was no sexual connection, I didn’t stay in the relationship. »
A memorable event of which he has not forgotten anything: at 18, Clayton flirts with an older girl (33 years old) in a downtown bar. In the middle of the afternoon, they have a drink, and crack, “on the spot”, she says to him: “come on”. “And we fucked at her house all afternoon!” »
I’ve always been attracted to older girls. The woman, the forms, I liked it like that.
Clayton, 46
Nevertheless, with the exception of this famous adventure (“and it always stayed in my head”), he always “caught” girls his age.
Paternity
At the start of his twenties, he met the mother of his boy, a story that lasted five years here. “But it faded pretty quickly. It started well, as long as we didn’t live together…”
Mid-twenties, therefore, our man finds himself with shared custody. But celibacy does not suit him and six months later, he is in a relationship again. “I am not made to be single, or to hunt, he confirms. Seduction is complicated. I prefer to be with a girl steadyrather than playing the small game… »
With this new girl, the story this time lasts 10 years. They even have a child. In bed ? ” Great cool. We had a lot of love. Of complicity. Of complementarity. The sex was cool, not necessarily in the mat, but fine. Pleasant, fairly regular. ” But ? “Until we have a child,” he continues. She lost her libido, and it never came back. »
They tried everything: time, therapy, everything. No, Clayton never cheated on her. “But I ate my stockings! he said. We worked hard to save it, but it didn’t work anymore. “And they left themselves for that, “among others”, he specifies.
The encounter
Here we are at the turn of the quarantine. Clayton, as we have said, is not made for celibacy. At work, he begins to “spotter”, to scout. And a woman particularly interests him. We guess who. And we guess right.
“I found it to my liking! She has a spiritual side, it’s quite rare, and yes, I’m hooked! I like that, the humans who are there, in full consciousness. I found her sexy, she’s a super beautiful woman, ”he says, photo in support. And yes, he knows it, Madame was (at the time) 59 years old. No, it doesn’t bother him (already). “For me, it’s the energy of the person that counts. If you have a shit energy at 4 years old, you will have the same energy later. I tell the children: if you want to change, start right away, because it’s long! »
How did he seduce her? By writing him a letter. By opening up to his reality (his separation process, his children, his intentions). “I went to feeling. But yes, she could have been in a relationship. He searched online for her address, then took the envelope to her mailbox. Direct. It took Madame a good week to respond (“ fucking‘ long ! “). “And she wanted to meet me to flush ! laughs Clayton heartily. Except that his charm visibly worked, the conversation flowed, and a week later, they were sleeping together. “When I saw her naked, I was super impressed. She has a really nice body shaped, we made love three times, four times, I don’t know! ” It was five years ago.
Since ? No, they don’t live together (“I have two flos in shared custody […], that would complicate things far too much”), but see each other several times a week. And their sexuality is still just as good. Felt.
There is a spiritual side to sexuality too. It’s important to feeler the other. […] Between us, it’s really the feeling.
Clayton
Once, and only once, did he hear a judgment as to their different ages. “But I don’t care, he repeats, still as categorical. Square. »
How does he see the future? “Me, I’m a day-to-day guy,” he replies. Don’t you know, you can have a bad luck. So I take care of her. ” Point. One day at a time. Ah! yes, and besides, his mother, barely older, adores him.
Moral ? “You have to listen to your intuitions,” concludes Clayton. Your feelings. Why limit yourself because of an age gap? It’s unrelated. Me, I cruised the person who interested me the most, and it’s a beautiful love story! »
* Fictitious first name, to protect his anonymity